After a little while, if you still feel the same (i.e. Trust me dude, do whatever you have to to end this A.S.A.P. Best of luck. She actually is (5 months now), but I took all the words back (the reasons why I didn't want to be with her). Obviously she is going to get custody if we split up. Privacy Policy. I don't know if your feelings of disconnection will pass but I sure hope they do. To begin, the average cost of vaginal delivery in the US, with health insurance, is $4,300. That's when one of them dropped the term . Don't marry someone you don't love. I do feel sorry for you and the situation you are in. Wasn't looking for a sugar daddy. You could split amicably and try to remain friends to do what's best for the child. Don't assume the baby will be just like his daddy, your baby may have a few similarities to him cause he's his child but your baby will be one of a kind in your eyes. ( though I don't see the first one as a mistake because making babies should not be a mistake.it is the natural order of things).you cant force people to do things out of their wishes and desires. Send all yourrelationship&Loveproblems/issues to me for help via [emailprotected]. **** will get tough before it gets better, but it will work out in the end. If I could do something different, it would be to divorce as soon as my last daughter was born. He bought it and it is in his name. 2Face. It was required that women felt their decreased desire was significantly lower than that of their partner's. The authors interviewed 15 women between the ages of 25 and 59. At the end of the day, you won't be able to find happiness that you have been looking for. I didn't want to waste one more day of my life feeling empty and with someone I didn't even like. On top of that, my age (early forties) scared me into accepting the situation thinking that i am too old to start all over again and wasting more time. Might not happen overnight but think of where you want to see yourself in a year. . Aim to have a better and best partner that you can have. Now it is tearing me apart. "Once you cross that line, look for life to get easier in every way. If it gets closer to your due date though, and you feel like nothing's changed, I do think it'd be a good idea to consider adoption. Long story short, I don't love my pregnant girlfriend. My girlfriend admitted to me that she cheated. NO PHYSICAL THINGS. If you just dont see it working it is better to do it now. No passion. Falling in love again at 47 and marrying for the second time at 52 was a miracle. *I also grew up in a home where my parents were unhappy. He and my parents think that we are in love, but I have been keeping my true feelings to myself for 6 months: I don't love him. Steve. It was enough for me to be content, while I gave the kids a life that I never had. Group Leaders communicate with staff moderators and escalate potential violations for review, but they dont moderate discussions. You do make a lot of sense and i guess this is the only way forward. I don't feel that he is someone that I want to be with forever. He was a rebound for me. HAPINESS IS AN INDIVIDUAL RESPOSIBLITY. Broken heart is a usual thing but, what is bad is the action that people choose to take to heal the broken heart itself. Find out to see whether he actually likes you by taking this quick free quiz. Yes, you can still be happy in a relationship without being married. hmmmm my advise to u is to pray to God n ask for forgiveness, i wonder the big talk u used on this gal b4 u got her on bed and now ur running frm ur responsibility. Do i tell my boyfriend i slept with someone else during short break up? Op: get a job and support yourself. When we found out this baby is a boy, the feeling of disconnection multiplied; I know this baby is going to be like his daddy. We had two kidsnice little family unit. She's too far along to have an abortion.,. the repercussions and consequences of such an act always plays out. It's no one else's responsibility to support you. Asking why you had sex with her in the first place wont solve this problem cos its everywhere in our societies and its just unfortunate your hit and run opportunity couldnt worked out. We made it to 8yrs. I thought the same! Glancing over my shoulder in a coffee shop, I saw a couple of women, both bouncing perfectly content babies on their laps. More answers below Quora User Managing Partner (Solicitor) & Mechanical Engineer Author has 20.3K answers and 10.7M answer views 1 y Personally, I think you should only have sex with people you are in love with. I do love her a lot as a person but i am not in love with her. The #1 app for tracking pregnancy and baby growth. She doesn't want an abortion, and I know it sounds terrible but I keep hoping she will miscarry, however she is 16weeks gone and that's unlikely . How can I believe I fathered the child if she's been unfaithful ? What to Expect has thousands of open discussions happening each day. And a bit frightening. My kids are doing good. And I still do. In fact, I was planning on breaking up with him right before I found out I was pregnant. Just not with her. I used to . Don't feel guilty if you're not in a constant state of love and bliss when you have a new baby. I too feel torn by a similar situation. You are right it is not fair to her. So remember to try to be the best of you. I was in love with someone else. Sooner or later it'll be over. Next time, WATCH BEFORE YOU LEAP, U see how some guys end up sleeping with gurls dey do not love?? Married for few months. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think. To cut a long story short I'm in a very My Pregnant Girlfriend is Pushing Me Away. Recently I found out I am pregnant. Having a baby can create a bond that encourages mature personal growth and strengthens a couple's commitment to each other -- but that doesn't happen overnight, and more often, it doesn't. Second thing that you can do after having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it is to be responsible. The problem I have now is that have a beautiful baby girl with one girl I impregnated whom I dont love. NOW WHY IS IT THAT SO MANY OF US HAD MESSED UP CHILDHOOD? Is it okay for you to feel down all the time thinking about the mistake you did? Being pregnant is not a free pass for not working. I try to act normal as Bella and I sit here talking, even though I'm feeling abnormally attracted to her even . We found out. Not that it matters - if you have feelings for someone else, you can't be in love with your gf so sounds like leaving is the right decision, as staying together for a child with someone you don't love never works out in the long run. Will you make a better progress by doing so? They didn't want to break up the family. (5 kg) or more a year after giving birth, Live Science previously reported. Forgotting that there's gonna be 3 children in his life forever? The educational health content on What To Expect is reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts to be up-to-date and in line with the latest evidence-based medical information and accepted health guidelines, including the medically reviewed What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff. I've been with my boyfriend for years and I still don't know if I love him. Welcome to the world little one! know it's right to give her the fact straight but she is just a really nice person, and I feel really **** you know! OK LETS TRY TO LOOK AT WHAT IS: IS ANYONE THINKING ABOUT THIS FROM THE CHILD PERSPECTIVE? There are many women out here who will do this if given the chance. She will touch you in a gentle way, kiss you softly and hug you with her heart. Reach out to your family and let them know what's going on. It was ok if we didn't want to be together. A Group Leader is a What to Expect community member who has been selected by our staff to help maintain a positive, supportive tone within a group. I don't know what I'm asking for, I'm just venting at the moment. And you will also need to take a firm decision on what you think is best to be done. Sure, most couples are madly "in love" at first, but as time goes on I think most people who have been married 10, 20, 50+ years will say that love is first a choice and then feelings follow and there are some hard times when the feelings are not there and all you are left with is the choice to show love to this person. I would sacrifice my own happiness and stay for the kids not interested in been with anyone else just want my girls and soon to arrive boy to be happy? if she wants to put kid in day care every day, she can and you pay for it). YES PRO-LIFE HOWEVER THINK ABOUT IT THIS WAY COULD YOU PROVIDE THE BEST FOR THE CHILD? If you don't like him, you don't have to live with him or use him. It's like I've been sleepwalking all this timeI apologize for my rumbling, i really needed to get this off my chest. My pregnant girlfriend doesnt seem to want me around. Knowing that you don't want to have the relationship with someone, you will never be able to fake your feelings for temporary happiness. THE CHILD WILL HAVE MOTHER AND FATHER TOGETHER. Noooo you have to marry and then spend the rest of your lives in hell with someone you slept with? So today at my apt (weekly NST/ ultrasound due to Covid protocol) baby girl measured 8lb 2 ounces and short so they are saying she will be a big baby and have a big headI had my cervix checked and Im not dilated any nor has Hi all. And when the oldest child was about 10, I finally left. Does he still love me? (1 to 2 kg . I want to come home from work to my son EVERY DAY OF THE WEEK, but I can't if me and the mother aren't together. I just put myself on hold. Remember, the decision you make will decide whether you will be happy or not in the near future. my point is no one really wins in this situation. Note that once you confirm, this action cannot be undone. Are these issues still there? On the most basic level, these changes, prompted by a flood of hormones during pregnancy and in the postpartum period, help attract a new mother to her baby. Nobody really knows what to expect when having a baby, but it does change everything, even if you're determined it won't. Some people may view the prospect of that change as scary and they may doubt their parental skills." Nobody forces you to live with him, if you really don't like him, you can find a job and leave. Does it feels good to fake your feelings? What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. The episode was written by Jennifer Crittenden and . Idnt also think the said mother would marry someone who wouldnt make her happy. not truly in love with the gf), then you can break up. Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). Couples do stay together when they are not in love, just for the sake of stability for the child. Rejecting your man's baby mama is almost the same as rejecting your boyfriend's child and you don't want to do that. And which case, most would be use safe sex and if thy got pregnant, they would try for an abortion. You will love that baby no matter what when it gets here! The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of What to Expect. 2) Are you prepared to forego this child and create a loving family with someone you truly love (which means you will wait for this new love to bear you a child).but be completely guilty all your life to abandon your first newborn just because you dont love your girlfriend. Second, if she were to make that decision previously to have an abortion for whatever reason you are not someone whose opinion matters since you're on an Internet forum and you don't know the personal lives of anyone on here enough to dictate that they should never have an abortion. You will need to know on how to get a Taurus man make a decision due to your current situation. An increasing number of South Korean women are choosing not to marry, not to have children, and not even to have relationships with men. What kept us together is our deep friendship and and our ability to communicate. We are two total opposite people. Americans love coffee. long story short. You're an adult. Think about it if you can't love him ever then end it and learn to co parent. 1.) I got pregnant with a 34 year old man with another baby and I'm only 19 we've know each other 3 months now but only knew each other a couple weeks when we found out. This difficult parent-child dynamic is most typical of families where one or both parents are narcissistic, but it's not exclusive to narcissists only. That's a bummer sadly, the pill can and often does fail, even if its taken 100% properly and on time (and it usually isn't), so you have to be REALLY careful with someone you dont want to reproduce with, as many men have found before you. Know his concern about the current situation and discuss. Having A Baby With Someone You Don't Want To Be With, How To Deal With It? Sometimes people make choices to abort, adopt, or keep the child. CLICK HERE to subscribe to our daily up-to-date news!! Babies can put stress on a couple because it requires both mom and dad to give of themselves. Time passed and we just got comfortable being there. Now she's pregnant. So, we got married. How I wish she can understand and let me leave my life and be free. His family is great also. If you want to be a dad, the fear that you'll only see your kid every other weekend and maybe once a week is legit. Everyone has their reasons for doing things and it's not up to us to judge them. Add to Collection. I must contain all this and somehow manage it thus minimizing any possible damage. All i will advice him to do is to sit the girl in question down and talk to her in a matured way. You CAN NOT let someone have the upper hand on you. You don't want support, you just want to hear he is a bad guy and you are a victim. How can you discuss your thoughts with her in a healthy way? Either way, I was ready to "play house". SCENARIO 2: STAY WITH THE PERSON YOU LOVE. no wonder we have the type of problems we have in our communitieswe are always reacting instead of thinking.. you cant correct a mistake or problem with another people.. There are reasons you should know and love yourself before you love someone else that will remind you to be true to yourself. Can you be responsible enough to make sure you are being safe? Grown apart and have no interest in each others lives! I couldn't be myself with him. The way you wrote that sounds like you think what a man wants is not as important as what a woman wants. I tried to keep them happy and not see the fighting. We only dated for three months before I got pregnant. I think it's best to do what will make you the happiest. You're sort of talking like you want a sugar daddy. It's that type of kindness you feel toward someone who's very close to your heart. Oh, I agree 100%. what is de main reason why u do not love her?? FTM. Also, if it's bad now it will only get worse once the baby is here. YOU GOT THIS! Tell her at home and in private. 'Don't expect rewards in love': woman, 32, who desperately wants a baby says she dated 100 men in a year, renewing marriage pressure debate in China A woman went on more than 100 dates. No need to waste time your life and time on him. love should beget love and not hate or fear..something society always fails to learn. Be true to yourself and you will allow yourself to get things that you deserve. Chandra is a mom of three boys (8, 4, and 3) and the founder of Oh Lovely Day, a lifestyle blog with a honest look at motherhood.She is trying to create more of an open dialogue with a no .
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having a baby with a woman you don't love